A True Story; Or When My Little Sister Renounced Her Faith At Thanksgiving Dinner

Thanksgiving“We’ve renounced Catholicism,” said my little sister, arms around my nieces. The family, congregating for Thanksgiving Dinner, was astonished. Used to outbursts like this from my little sister, this one surprised us all. And she was serious.

My mom just shook her head back and forth.

Her cousin, the current patriarch of the family put his head in his hands.

“Cool,” said his renegade quasi-reformed hippy wife. “It’s all downhill with Benedict anyway.”

My nieces both smiled. The youngest, Francesca, sat up straight and said proudly, “we’re Pastafarians now.”

“You’re devoted to the God of noodles now?” I asked her.

“No,” said my sister, “Rastafarian.”

“That makes me feel sooo much better,” said my bewildered mom.

“Mom,” she said in a defensive tone, “Rastafarians believe in the Trinity. And that god, whom we call Jah, will provide.”

Our ninety year-old matriarch chimed in.

“But what about Baptism for the girls?”

“Oh, we do that,” my sister said.

“What, with bong water?”

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